yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
