So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
