Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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