To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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