I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize