What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
