Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Randomize