I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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