mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
