RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
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