Sponge bath it is.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
