Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
