that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
