He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
