I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Randomize
