We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
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