just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Randomize
