I wish I could punch you in the face.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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