I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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