Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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