smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Shame - the story of my life.
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