I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I'm sobbing to NWA
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
