At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
