Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
