Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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