he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
sex in a hospital.. check
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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