Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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