I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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