The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Randomize
