Dual....:-)
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
