For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
