my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
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