Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Randomize
