Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
