so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
