kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
We're too hungover to prance.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
