Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Randomize
