Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize