Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
