Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
