i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
