is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
