He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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