mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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