Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
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