Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Maybe he injected his testicle?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
