belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize