when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
