We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
