you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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